Friday, May 19, 2006

Seasons of time...

    

   
"For everything there is a season, and a time for every purpose
      under heaven."
         
                                                 - Ecclesiastes 3:1


I was given the subject of "time" to write about by
Cyndy
and have been pondering it since yesterday.  The first thing that instantly popped into my mind when Cyndy gave me this assignment was the title of my journal, "There is a Season".   My journal has this special title because of the many beloved "seasons" in my past and the "seasons" that I am bound to experience in the future.  I see my life as chunks of "time".  Time spent in my childhood with my family and in school.  I look back at that time with mixed feelings as I had some happy times, but I also had some childhood depression, no doubt brought on by an un-diagnosed chiari malformation.  Chiari causes neurological problems and, no doubt, spurred on my bipolar disorder very young.  I knew that I was different than other kids and teenagers because I wasn't always happy and I had alot of fears.  I became an adult and had my own family with two children.  There were glorious times spent with the little ones.  I also had hideous depression.  I was suffering from un-diagnosed bipolar disorder, un-diagnosed fibromyalgia and un-diagnosed obsessive compulsive disorder.  It was hard to keep up with a small family when I was very sick and I didn't know what was going on.  I still had moments of joy, though.  I spent countless times in and out of the hospital for the bipolar disorder and obsessive compulsive disorder in my twenties.  It took alot of fortitude.  I was well on my way to being on track and feeling better in my early 30's concerning my mental illnesses when my neurological problems started.  Time spent lying in a hospital bed after brain surgeries with no pain medicine and lying in bed with alot of nerve and muscle pain taught me what was important in my life and what I can withstand and how courageous I am.  I spent six months on a couch once.  I was so very sick.  I spent a couple weeks in bed after two brain surgeries.  I still spend days in bed with fibromyalgia.  When I have to spend time by myself, which I often do, I am never, ever bored.  I have learned that there is always something, somewhere inside of me that I can go to that is animated and interesting and enjoys "me" and can take care of "me".  I have learned to trust me to take care of me now.  I look forward to the future because my general mood is happy now with moments of joy.  I could never say that before.   Now I can share what I have learned with my children and grandchildren as I spend time with them in the future!!  I look forward to seeing them grow and becoming unique individuals!!  That is so exciting to me!  I have time to spend with family and friends to look forward to!!  I have time to see what else I can learn from my life that I haven't learned thus far!  It is amazing when I take a step back and see what I have learned from each "season" of my life.  Whether it was a rough season or a joyful one, it has all been worth it as I have learned something to take with me the rest of my life.  I have learned something about myself and grown stronger.  I certainly could not have done any of this without the help of God whom I talk to and pray to everyday and whom sustains me and is my friend.  I have had alot of mental and physical strife in my life, but I know that it has made the flowers brighter and the birds sing more beautifully and the time spent with myself and others more wonderful.  I am grateful for it all.  Thanks for stopping by!  xox

One more thing, speaking of "seasons" of life... I wanted say
CONGRATULATIONS to my son, Matt, who is graduating from high school tomorrow!!  CONGRATS
, Matt!!  I am so proud of you!!!!

   

 

27 comments:

  1. Beautiful entry.  I also was given the assignment to write about time from Cyndy.  Isn't it funny, both you and my son having Chiari, and both being chosen to write about time.  Have a great weekend.
    Missie

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  2. Congratulations to Matt!! Sounds like you've had a rough time in life. Shows what a tough lady you are to have coped with it and overcame a lot of it! Well done to you too! Have a lovely weekend. Jeannette xx

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  3. Beautiful story friend.

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  4. Lovey entry deaar. CONGRATS to Matt!!! & CONGRATS to you for helping to get him this far! ;0
    Have a wonderful wkend!
    Hugs,
    SUGAR

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  5. It took a lot of inner strength to write this and it's inspiration for everyone. I don't know who could read this and not feel inspired to enjoy our blessings more, even on our bad days. You are a gift from God and I love you.

    Angela

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  6. you'r a very good strong woman val. always fight it....roberta

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  7. Congrats on your strong spirit, your incredible writing ability, and what lies down the road for a special lady who has been through so much, come so far?

    Hooray for your son.  I am so excited about your grandchildren .  ..   but by the Grace of God, I expect many creative projects and some surprises which will inspire and impress ALL who know YOU.  Val, you have so much to give.  I predict that this is the SEASON OF VAL!

    Beautifully written. I hope some new wonderful people come to visit due to being featured, and that you enjoy the experience!

    Hugs and God Bless,
                           Cyn

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  8. Valerie, beautiful entry.  You are beautiful.

    Krissy
    http://journals.aol.com/fisherkristina/SometimesIThink

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  9. Wonderful story, Val.  Isn't it amazing when we find out just how courageous we really are?  As someone who lives with chronic pain (neuropathy, sciatia) I understand the "time" you spent in and out of pain, and what you learned from it all.  Pain is just something that hurts unless you listen to it, make a friend of it, then live as fully as possible.  Congrats!  Cathy

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  10. You truly are an inspiration to follow.  A living saint!
    Congrats to Matt...class of 06!
    -Kellen

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  11. ((((((((((V))))))))))))  Yay!  Congrats chica!  I haven't deserted you guys...just end of the school year crazy here.  Yay you! ;)  C.  http://journals.aol.com/gdireneoe/thedailies

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  12. the pictures are beautiful.  congrats to matt!!! you must be very proud.  i think you are a strong and wonderful woman. the many challenges in your life have made you who you are today.. i hope all is well with chelsea.

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  13. Congrats on being a guest editor's pick!! -Dawm-

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  14. lovely journal, and beautiful pics... I, too thought about this bible verse when Cyndy mentioned time.  It's one of my favorites.  Have a great weekend... I'll be back!!  Michelle  

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  15. What a wonderful entry my dear Val.  You are such a strong woman.  How do you do it.  I'm sitting here crying for you.  Crying for myself.  I'm hurting SO bad tonight.  I don't understand it, Val.  Why do SO many people have to be in such pain?   Why is John so ill? Why are so many people alone and hurting?  I just don't understand.  Your son is graduating?!?!? Congratulations Matt.  He has a wonderful Mom.  I love ya, kid.  Talk to you soon.
    Hugs, Barb

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  16. Congrates on being one of the Guest Editor's picks this week and also well wishes for your son!

    I love that scriptuer and title for your journal.. it had dawned on me that I had wished I had named mine that lol but I think it suits you best.  I will have to for sure add you to my growing list of alerts.

    Much Love,
    Mary

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  17. Congrats on being an Editor's Pick.

    Carolyn
    http://journals.aol.com/shelt28/MyLife

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  18. Congratulations ShugahPie!!!!!!!

    I am so proud to be your friend...and I must say, fantastic entry!  

    xoxoxo,
    Andi

    ps: WTG Matt! You've got a great MOM!

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  19. Hi ! Nice to meet you! I got chosen this week too ~ many congrats to you !!! Love your pictures ~ they certainly define changing seasons! Brilliant :-) I like the way you see the seasons as past and present times of your life ~ I've never thought of it like that before. I read Missie's journal and understand about Chiari and I'm sorry to hear you are suffering. I've put you on my alerts so will see you soon !! Hope you're having a great weekend!
    hugs Debbie ~xxx~
    http://journals.aol.com/debbiewebb4465/TheLifeTimesofanEssexGirl

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  20. Great entry Val!    The comments follow with your inspirational thoughts.    To say that you can be happy even when things beyond our control cause us to accept what we are given.   I could not function any more this morning and had to rest.   I worked for 8 hours yesterday which is the first time I have continuously done physical labor for a long time.    I have the sense of accomplishment that is unique to me and not by someone's standard other than my own.    My ear is still draining but I do not feel the infection that was draining my energy for over a week.    Being satisfied with our ability knowing that pain will control the standard set.    The photo's are wonderful.     mark

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  21. Beautiful pics Val. One of my favorite verses also. Enjoyed your entry. Congradulations to matt, I know how proud you are

    Hugs
    angelrose

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  22. Congrats Matt!  You rock!!!!  And, of course, so does your wonderful Mom...

    be well,
    Dawn

    Congrats on being one of Cyndee's picks...

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  23. Hi, I came across your journal for the first time today because Cyndy featured you as a geust editor picks. I like your concept of time and seasons. Feel free to visit me some time,
    Kate.
    http://journals.aol.co.uk/bobandkate/AnAnalysisofLife/

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  24. Time is very precious--we often forget what a great gift it is.

    Congratulations to Matt--I hope is path is always bright!

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  25. Beautiful Val. Rache

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  26. Val~I love the photos here and congrats to Matt. In all honesty I have bookmarked to come back and read the entry! ;-) Sass

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  27. This is a truly inspiring entry, Val. It is filled with wisdom.

    --Tom

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