Having Lots of Fun!!

Good day everyone!  Boy, I have been going, and going, and going...just like the Energizer Bunny!  My shunt must be working because I am actually keeping up with Chelsea and she is a teenager!!   I decided to include a picture of my Mama today as I wanted to honor her as a teenager.  I thought it might be interesting to compare her to my two teenaged children around the same age.  I asked my Mama what age she was when I first saw this picture and I was astounded to hear her tell me that she was just 17.   I have always thought that my Mama looked elegant and beautiful and graceful in pictures.   Her identical twin sister passed away in October of last year.   I am one of the few people that can pick out which one is my mother and which one is her twin sister, Chrissie, in pictures.  They were always posing in pictures together wearing the same outfits.  By their teenage years, though, they had their own styles and were not dressed alike.  This picture has me thinking.  I wonder where her sister was?  Well, more about my sweet Mama and her sweet twin later...

About Chels and her arrival... I greeted her at the airport with flowers and a couple of tears, goosebumps, and a big hug!  I had waited 12 years for this!!  Oh, to hold her and know that she was staying and not having a date to go back home to another state, another home, away from me and away from my arms.  I was elated!  She was greeted by me, my good friend Karen, her good friend, Ali (Alison) who is Karen's daughter, and her friend Erin.  We gabbed and laughed all the way home.  Chelsea's smile was so big and she had the darkest Florida tan because she had been staying at a resort which had been her home for about three weeks because of the hurricane.  We arrived home to balloons and a dinner prepared for her that were her requested and favorite foods.  We talked and shared pictures and stories and had a really nice time.  Chelsea talked alot about the hurricane and about how much she missed her two-year-old brother, Sammy.  He is cute as a button and they have grown very close.  He was the hardest for her to leave.  That really, really hurts my heart.  I will put pictures of Sammy in here sometime as he is just adorable and looks somewhat like Chelsea.  Our guests then went home and Chelsea and I spent a relaxing time talking, getting her settled in her new bedroom and spent some time on the computer.

The second day we visited my parents (her O'pa and O'ma).  We then went to my friend, Karen's, house and spent some time talking and roaming around on their land.  They live on a beautiful piece of land which was once a working farm.  It has beautiful trees, a barn, a running creek, a stone street you can walk on, an occasional deer or fox or whatever animal you might see, and  is just a great place to get away from it all.  It has concord grape vines and a swing, and, well, I just find something new there everytime I go!!  We picked up Ali and went shopping, shopping, shopping!!  Chelsea lost all of her belongings and most of her clothes and we are trying to replace what she needs.  So, you know teenagers and shopping!  It was alot of fun, though!  I knew that the articles we picked up were much needed!  Then we went grocery shopping.  And as the saying goes....Never go grocery shopping when you are hungry....and never tell a teenager to pick out anything they want! lol  Chelsea and I have totally different tastes in food.  I eat very little meat and like to eat nuts, fruit, vegetables, yogurt and cheese and very little junk food.  Chelsea likes junk food, meat, no vegetables, and lots of quick fix items and not too many fresh fruits or vegetables and milk products.  I think we are going to be eating seperate meals often.  Then we went home and Ali and Chels went out to a movie and out for a bite to eat at a restaurant while I caught up on a little housework and a little reading.  By this time my fibro. was really kicking in and my body was screaming from every pore.  Then Chels and Ali got home and Ali spent the night and they had a wonderful "girl time".

I am sitting here right now typing this as Ali and Chels were just picked up by Karen and they are spending some time over at Karen's house.  We are "sharing" the girls and as far as we are both concerned, we both have two daughters. Ali is just a great, great girl.  So, I have had a blast just being with Chels the past few days and having a house that is full of energy and smiles and noises and I am so happy that I have been able to keep up.  A year ago I would not have been able to.  Neurosurgery has saved my life and given me a life!  A year ago I would have been irritable by now.  A year ago I would have been in bed for three days after all of this activity.  A year ago I wouldn't have been able to make this journal entry.  I am so thankful that God, in His timing, and what beautiful timing He has, and in His wisdom, has given me His blessings and has brought my daughter to live with me.  Chelsea, thanks for choosing to make this your home at this point in time!  To all you out there in J-Land, may you all have a peaceful day!

Chelsea Is Arriving!!

YAY!!!  Chelsea is coming toay!!  In honor of her I am typing this in her favorite color and putting pictures in here to share with everyone today!!  I do hope you enjoy her smile and get a glimpse of the joy that she shares with her family and friends!  She is a wonderful young adult!  We have a little party waiting here for her with a dinner, flowers, cakes, balloons, etc. for her!!  Oh, I do hope we don't overwhelm her.  It is a muggy day out today, but I am sure she is used to that.  Poor Krissy is suffering asthma and can't leave her air-conditioned home, so those who are prone to praying, that would be appreciated :).  She goes through alot - Krissy does.  I am off to get ready for the day...Yoo-Hoo...

Pics of Matthew

These are the pics of  Matthew that I promised.  He still hasn't contacted me from his friend's house so he had just better call his Mama and give me the phone number where he is at!!!  I will be putting pictures of Chelsea in here this weekend and also a picture of my mom when she was the same age as Chelsea is now!!!  Cool, huh?!  Have a good evening all!

A Wonderful Poem

The Invitation
Oriah Mountain Dreamer
Copyright (c) 1999
Published by Mountain Dreaming

THE INVITATION

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for,
and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.

It doesn't interest me how old you are.
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love,
for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon.
I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow,
if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled
and closed from fear of further pain.
I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own,
without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own,
if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy
fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be
careful,
to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true.
I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself;
if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul;
if you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see beauty, even when it's not pretty, every day,
and if you can source your life from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine,
and still stand on the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes!"

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up after a night of grief
and despair, weary and bruised to the bone,
and do what needs to be done for the children.

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not
shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied.
I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself
and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.





My beautiful sister-in-law, Shawn, sent me this poem this morning and I wanted to share it with everyone as I thought it was a wonderful one and shared sentiment that was in my soul as well.  Living daily life is important, but actually jumping in and experiencing life with empathy, desire, trustworthiness, gusto.....etc. is extra important.  I know that this is particularly hard when one has daily depression, mood swings, and daily pain as I do.  So I salute all of you who are joining in with life and actually winning this battle.  Even if it is something small on some days.    I hope everyone enjoyed it!   Krissy and her fiance, John, are coming over to watch a movie, The Princess Diaries with me today at 1:00pm.  I am really looking forward to this as I haven't relaxed and taken any time out for myself and just "gotten away from it all".  To those of you in the U.K.-  My prayers are with all of you, that Charley will be kind to you and that there will be little flooding and damage done.  I know that when it rains on me and it is windy my fibro. acts up as does my depression.  It is the curse of the chronically ill.  Do take care of yourselves over there!  Sending prayers!

I'm Thankful Tonight

Where, oh where, have all the AOL alerts gone?  Oh where, oh where can they be?  Oh well.  I had fun jumping around everybody elses' journals and looking and seeing what everyone wrote today and investigating instead of being alerted and just reading my alerts.  I do love reading other's journals and I think it is cool that we can "peak" into other's lives.  I am a little bit socially phobic and like to stay at home alot.  So blogging is a good way to meet people and be honest and say what is on your mind and still be in your p.j.'s. and not have to worry about the social gathering part of finding others.  I do believe that I am not going to find a husband this way, though, so I better get over my social phobia!!  I am feeling grateful tonight, though, as it is getting closer to my daughter's arrival!  Two more days!!  I am "nesting" here.  I have been doing all kinds of housework and all kinds of preparations for her arrival and the gratification is enormous.  I have not lived with my children for twelve years, so I have not felt this kind of gratification since Chelsea was six.  I know it sounds crazy that a mother has not had her children for twelve years, but that is a long, long story that I will write for another entry.  It is a source of enormous pain and will take alot of energy for me to write.  It will also take some trust in my readers.  Chelsea called me last night and told me that they have to bulldoze their house and that it is a total loss.  She said that when you walk into the house there is mold on the walls and windodws and there is no roof anymore.  You sink into the carpets as there is so much water and they lost all of their possessions.  They are destroyed by this toxic mold and fiberglass and water damage.  Now my son went to live with a friend for six months or so until they can build a new house.  His darn (I want to use a stronger word!) father never gave me the address or phone number of the friend that he is staying at so I have no idea where my son is!!  My son is 16 and his name is Matthew.  I plan on putting a picture of him in my journal tomorrow.  He is a wonderful kid.  He had better call his Mama soon!!  I also wanted to tell the world tonight that God is very good and that He is my heart and I wanted to praise Him!  He has done so many good things for me recently!  I don't say it out loud enough, but God is the center of my universe and everything spokes out from Him.  With that, I will sign off and hope that everyone is well tonight and that everyone is feeling peaceful....

I I Could Be....

I found this in someone's journal and liked it and (with permission) I decided to fill it out.  Enjoy!

If I Could Be

 

If I could be a time of day, I would be:  evening when the sun is setting.

If I could be a planet, I would be:  earth..it's natural

If I could be a direction, I would be:   horizontal...I like my bed....or north..I hate being hot

If I could be a piece of furniture, I would be:   a big over-stuffed chair

If I could be a stone, I would be:  garnet

If I could be a tree, I would be:  a weeping willow

If I could be a bird, I would be: a hummingbird

If I could be a flower, I would be:  a wild African Violet

If I could be a kind of weather, I would be: I would be the four seasons, but my winter would be mild and my summer would never go over 68 degrees with low humidity..I have enough moods to be the four seasons ;-) 

If I could be a musical instrument, I would be: the wooden flute

If I could be a color, I would be: red

If I could be an emotion, I would be: compassion

If I could be a sound, I would be: humming

If I could be a car, I would be: a Toyota Corolla 

If I could be a material, I would be: cotton

If I could be a taste, I would be: mango

If I could be ascent, I would be:  the smell after the rain

If I could be a word, I would be:  This one is hard..um...meow

If I could be a facial expression, I would be:  ;-o

And if I could be anyone, I would be:  I would only be me!

Chicks and a Goat and The Amish

Good evening everyone.  I had a pretty laid-back day.  It was calm and fun and at times humorous.  When I woke up I had told myself that I must get some housework done.  I was resigned to do this when a friend asked me if I wanted to go for a car ride with him.  I don't much like housework and I love car rides, so it was a pretty easy decision to push back the housework for a later time.  We hopped in the car and off we went.  First we went to Wal-Mart where I picked up bird seed, cat litter and a stuffed animal for Chelsea's new bed.  Then we headed off to my friend, Roger's, aunt Linda's house.  She lives right in the heart of Amish country.  A few of you asked who the Amish were.  To explain them simply, they are a Protestant sect of religious folk who choose to live away from mainstream life.  They have no electricity or plumbing and farm off their land.  They go to their own schools - only to the eigth grade usually - at which time they are needed on the farm or at home or at their family's business.  They ride in horse-drawn buggies and are pretty strict disciplinarians.  They have lots of kids and take care of each other very well.  The women wear dark skirts and a blouse and bonnet and are very "hardy" and the men wear dark pants, shirts and suspenders and a hat.  The married men have beards but no moustaches.  They do not have to pay taxes in the U.S. and do not believe in the government.  I visit them here and there to buy from their orchards or from their baked goods shops or eat in their restaurants, etc.  When you visit them you can't help thinking about the "meaning of life" or what things were like before we were inundated with so much technology.   Anyway, Roger's Aunt Linda is friends with the Amish and she (his aunt) was watching about five small children today.  These children "borrowed" two chicks from her Amish neighbors.  I sat and held these chicks for a long time.  I was amazed as I had never held a bird before in my life.  Birds have kind of frightened me.  These chicks were very, very calm.  Right next to these birds were two dogs frolicking about.  I was amazed that the dogs did not try to eat the birds.  As I was holding the chicks I felt very peaceful.  Then one didsomething I thought was quite amazing.  He kept pecking me.  So I thought he wanted down and I let him down right next to me.  He had to go poo-poo. lol.  Then he hopped right back in my hand.  So these two birds snuggled in my hands for a couple of hours and any time they needed to poo they just pecked on my fingernail and I let them down!  Then they would hop back up!  Then the children took the birds to the miniature goat that was tied up in the yard.  This was the first time I had met a miniature goat before, too!  They set the chicks in the yard with the goat.  So, now here are two chicks, a goat and two dogs and they are just sitting and staring at one another!  I was amazed!  I guess I am a city girl, but I would think that they would be fighting!  Then one chick jumped on the back of the goat and about thirty seconds later the second chick jumped on the back of the goat and they fell asleep!   And the goat is walking around with two asleep chicks on its back!  It was too funny!  So I pet Betsy The Miniature Goat for awhile before I left because I had never had the privilege of meeting a goat before.  She was a sweetie.  The kids gave the chicks the names "Fuzzy" and "Eagle".  They were grey and tan with spots.   We then said goodbye to everyone and all the animals and took a long drive back home.  

I was very grateful to have gotten out today as it was so beautiful and sunny out.  It had finally stopped raining.  I was getting tired of the rain leaking through my roof.  Drip...drip...drip....drip...Chinese water torture.  I called my landlord this morning to report that, yes, it is still leaking (since he hasn't fixed it yet!) and would he please fix it soon.  It has been leaking since I moved in at the beginning of the month :-( Every once in awhile a piece of plaster comes down and clomps to the floor.  Oh well.  I told him today that Chelsea is moving in next Saturday and he said that would be just fine.  I was a little worried about letting him know that she was coming.  I don't know why, but I was.  Anyway, Chelsea gets here in six days!!!  I am so excited!  Her family is staying in a resort down in Florida that her aunt works at.  The resort has kindly given them a suite for free!  I don't know how long they can stay, but it has been over a week already and they are already okayed through next Wednesday.  I think that is so nice of the hotel.  So, if anyone is going to Walt Disney World, stay at Celebrations in Orlando!!!!  Well, I think I will finally go do some of that housework.....toodles.....